Chapter 8:
The Version of You in Each Choice

I don’t know if this will help, but I sometimes imagine that choices aren't just paths we walk down, but different sets of clothes we agree to wear. If you choose Option A, you become a person who wears boots and carries a heavy backpack. If you choose Option B, you might be the person in a linen shirt, walking barefoot.

It’s a bit strange, but we spend so much time worrying about whether the *choice* is right, that we forget to look at who *we* become once we make it. Every decision you make is a vote for a specific version of yourself. You aren't just changing your circumstances; you are changing your shape.

I want you to try a simple visualization. Close your eyes for a second and think about the two options you’ve been agonizing over. Don't look at the pros and cons this time. Look at the "You" who lives in each one.

This isn't about being poetic or finding some mystical "true self." It’s just real life. If you choose to stay in a job that drains you, the version of you in that choice is likely tired, a bit cynical, and perhaps very safe. If you choose to leave, the version of you in that choice is perhaps anxious, energetic, and a bit raw. Neither version is "better" or "worse" in a moral sense—they are just different people.

I’ve realized that we often reject certain paths not because the path is bad, but because we don't like the person we would have to become to survive it. And that is one of the most honest ways to make a decision. If a choice requires you to be someone you don't recognize—someone who has to hide their heart or silence their intuition—then that choice has a hidden cost that no spreadsheet can capture.

In Tarot, I think about the Six of Swords. You see the figure in the boat, their back turned to us, rowing away from the turbulent water toward a quiet shore. The version of the person in that boat is someone who has learned how to let go. They aren't "happy" yet—the card is quite grey—but they are a person who has chosen movement over stagnation. Their identity is now tied to the journey, not the shore they left behind.

When you pull cards to explore these versions of yourself, try a very simple three-card pull. Don't ask what will happen. Ask who you will be.

Card 1: The person I am today (The starting point).
Card 2: The version of me that emerges in Path A.
Card 3: The version of me that emerges in Path B.

I did this once when I was deciding whether to continue a specific writing project under a pseudonym or use my real name. Path A (The pseudonym) gave me the Moon—I would be a person living in shadows, perhaps creative but also a bit disconnected. Path B (Real name) gave me the Sun—I would be a person who is seen, which felt vulnerable but also warm.

The cards didn't tell me which one would sell more books. They showed me the experience of being me in each scenario.

I don’t know if this will help, but try to remember that you are allowed to choose based on the version of you that feels most "alive." Not the most successful. Not the most responsible. Just the one that feels like they have the most room to breathe.

It’s a bit strange, but once you realize that you will be okay regardless of which "you" you choose, the fear starts to lose its grip. You realize that you have the capacity to be many different people. You can be the brave one, or the cautious one, or the adventurous one. All of them are you.

So, take a look at those versions of yourself today. Wave hello to them. They are all waiting for you. And whichever one you pick, you’ll find that you still know how to be yourself, just in a slightly different light.

(The most important thing isn't where the path leads,
but the person you become while walking it.)